Sometimes...

Some moments a smile is hard to come by. Some nights after a 4-hour Risk game, you feel ready to tie shoelaces for the next 7 hours to compensate for the time lost. Sometimes you wish you hadn't ditched your roommate and sister for what you once thought would be a thrilling night of fun. And sometimes as you're facebooking, you realize how distant once-close friends have become. Some people you once admired have lost that special place in your heart. Sometimes your home (wherever that be) has tensions you can't seem to overcome. It breaks your heart a little.

I really don't know how to call the shots. Looking at pics, I realize how naïve and blindly hopeful I was. 

I don't even know what I'm doing... and smiling is just so hard right at this second in time. ? Why? Today I was elated and just all sorts of giddy. Then I'm surrounded by people I thought were best friends, and I feel disinterested, nervous, and imperfect. I think I'm going to find a cave and chill out there.